Frazzled and Frenzied

It took an awfully long time for the confusion in my mind to settle. I had been trying to get my Synology server to connect to two of my laptops, quite unsuccessfully I might add. My brain had got caught up in the twirl of connections, passwords, users, protocols, and permissions.

Eventually, I gave up and started to watch television, The Americans is our binge-series of the moment. It is suitably undemanding, which meant that gradually my mind quietened from the earlier frenzy into something like normal mode.

Three episodes later, and the threat of nuclear war still on the brink (although of course, we know that it didn't happen don't we) it is time to call it a night. And then, just as we prepared for bed the eureka moment hit me.

Why bother syncing two or more computers, why not just have the newest in sync, and the others backed up periodically, manually. I determined that I would set it up that way, but in the morning, because now I wanted to sleep.

In future, I will try to avoid going through the frenzied stage, which really came about because I had just dived in trying to do something, without actually knowing either a) what I needed to do, or b) how I could do it. Unfortunately, this is not an unusual occurrence.

I am on week 7 of the authentic self, which is called connections but is actually about relationships; work, friends, partners, spouses, and children are all enquired about. I am reminded of an old collection, of frazzled and frenzied poems, called Yorkshire Love Poems and Other Desperate Stuff, here is one of those poems:

I ought to sleep

I ought to go to sleep

I want to carry on

I ought to, I want to

Anyway what's to stop me

The rain and the wind?

They are outside

The dark of the night?

Simples

Use artificial light

Is it artificial?

Light

Seems odd that

What is nature ... 

Things not made by man? 

But am I not made by ...

Perhaps?

I ought to

Go to, sleep